Friday, April 22, 2011

Friendship= fear. Apparently.

I have to admit, my life has been pretty stress-free when it comes to the friend department. As it should be. Friends are there to hang out with, giggle with, go out with. NOT compete with. Nor be in fear of.

Let me back up. I had been friends w/ someone in the past. We'll call them Z. I am not friends with Z now. I have no reaon to be. Z's take on friendship is "who will give me the most attenion? who will do whatever I ask?" Because I gave up being on Z's schedule and bowing down to them, Z decided I was not worth their time. Ya know what? I'm perfectly fine with it. I made the last contact, congratulating Z on a very exciting time in their life, but since I did not go running to them when they thought I should, Z has not reciprocated in contact. And because of this I have not had to worry if I'm on their shit-list for the week, or the "I'm not talking to you until someone else pisses me off" list.

I am still friends and acquaintances (sp?) with people that are still "friends" with Z. I recently just heard that 2 of them (we'll call them M & N) are having, well, basically an affair. M & N have found they have a lot in common and have a ton of fun together so they meet up and hang out, unbeknownst to Z. They have promised not to tell Z that they have this knew friendship because they don't want Z to become mad & jealous. WTF!? Are you kidding!? You consider Z a friend if they are not even letting you be friends w/ whoever you want? You're 20-something years old!!! Get a handle on your own life!

After hearing this shocking news, I then found out another hysterical story. Z and some friends were out drinking one night. Z went home early to tend to some business. A "friend" needed a ride home because they had been drinking so they asked Z's significant other for a ride home. It was then decided that this would not be told to Z because they didn't want Z accusing them of doing anything together. Again, wtf!?

Z obviuosly has trust issues and feels the need to be the center of attention all the time. I really feel that Z has no actual friends, as they all seem to live in fear...fear of being kicked to the curb and having to crawl back on hands and knees to beg for forgivness (for nothing done wrong!)

There is an event coming up in Z's life that should be exciting and fun for everyone involved, but I feel that all of Z's friends are going to be working overtime to be on their best behavior so they don't get "kicked out" rathen than enjoying it as they should.

These friends need to stand up for themselves, together if needed, to show that the way they are being treated is not the correct way a friend should be treated. I was too scared to call Z out on this and decided the best way for me to go was to just stop contact. It worked for me and I'm fine with it, but because it was only me, Z will never realize that she is the problem. If Z loses all friends then maybe Z will realize that they are the problem and need to change the way they are treating their friends. Only when Z realizes that they are the problem and chooses to fix the ways, will Z have friends. Real friends.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

High School Drama

So, as I mentioned before, I got a new job. Well, same type of job, different place.

I was in the library at an elementary school. It was nice. Quiet. Crafty. Very relaxed. At the end of the school year I was told I'd be working in that same library part time- 3.5 hours a day. So not cool, but at least I would still be working partially. Fast forward through a whole summer of sitting on the beach and sub-consciously stressing about not having health insurance or enough money to pay bills and BAM! 1 week before we are supposed to report to Opening Day at Columbia I get a call form Administration. "Congratulations! You are back to full time!" Woo-Hoo!!! "You will be moved into Columbia." Ummmm. "As a secretary for an Assistant Principle." Sh*t.

Let's take a step back and look at the big picture. Elementary School. High School. Library. AP Office. Books. Discipline. Children that pick their nose and giggle. Children that drop the 'F' bomb at you (and still pick their nose). I'm seeing a TAD bit of a difference between the 2 jobs.

And BOY, am I right!!!! The job here at the high school is so much more fast-paced and exhausting! I am constantly doing something (or procrastinating, lol). The days fly by, which is actually quite nice.

The amount of drama these high school students get themselves involved in is nuts. It causes so many problems that have nothing to do with actual school. And the parents have no control over their children anymore- it's disgusting. All I hear is complaints from the children or the parents or the teachers here. Nobody does anything for themselves and no one is motivated.

The conversation up here is much more interesting than talking to 1st graders. I've learned some very interesting things about how children are growing up nowadays. I've taken a few problem children under my wing and I think I'm doing an ok job of keeping them out of too much trouble. Well, at least instead of causing problems in the lunchroom they sit in here with me.

I'll admit, I am scared of some of the students. Especially after they throw chairs and yell and swear and slam doors. (We got rid of that one- phew). But there are some students that are def involved in drugs and god knows what they would do if they can't get their fix. I can picture some in future harming people or themselves. It's very sad, and there really is no one to help them because it's all mental.

Once again, it's budget time and of course Nagle (who is pregnant btw- poor kid that will be...) wants a raise, so people will lose their jobs again. I'm prepared to be told that I'm down to part time again. And I'm also prepared to be in a different school next year, doing a different job again. I'm telling the kids here to not expect to see me here next year and they can't comprehend why move me again to:
have me learn a new job after I've spent the entire past year learning to do this one
2) have another person teach me how to do whatever new job I'm placed in
have my boss now teach someone new this job
have the students try to bond w/ someone new next year who may not get along as well

Our high school students can see that moving people and cutting people is stupid- but Administration can't.... GRRRRR!!!!

I haven't been too vocal to Dave about how I feel about this all again. I'm sure I'll have a breakdown at some point. I've asked him to look into getting on the same health insurance even though we're not married because that is one of my biggest concerns. So I'm sure the next time I bring it up, there might be a little melt down about everything again...

Monday, March 21, 2011

Woah! It has def been a long time, huh?! Sorry about got really crazy. Would you like an update? Of course you would, other wise you wouldn't be reading this, huh?

Soooooo, I finished out my summer in Maine. It was fabulous and sunny and I didn't want to come back. But I did. To a new life basically. New job, new place of residence, new friends.

About a week before I was to depart Maine, I got a call from EGCSD telling me I was re-instated to fulltime!!! Yay! But I would be re-located. Boo. To the high school. Shit. I was told I'd be a secretary for one of the AP's. Yikes!

I moved out of my studio apt :-( And into The Boy's apt :-) He let me decorate the bathroom. Lol. And Tom Brady was not allowed to come with me. Misty also had to re-locate to Mom & Dad's for awhile. Considering Dave is bothered by cat hair I figured I'd wait until we have at least a 2 bedroom place before the cat is allowed back. I miss her though.

Christin got married! Oh yea, and got pregnant! The wedding was fun and everything went well. Minus the fact that I forgot the ring. Lol. That was amusing...after I figured out how to get the ring before she was asked to place it on Bill's finger. I think it would have been more of a good time if Christin had not been pregnant and I'd been able to drink more. Lol. Che's due in about a week- yikes! Little Kaydence will be joining us.

I got back into teaching at the studio. 1 class on Mondays, 3 on Tuesdays, 2 on Thursdays and 4 competition dances (!). My kids are crazy. I love them. Hehe.

So, to sum everything up:
The job is quite interesting. It's def faster paced then the library was and I like it. I'm glad I'm here. I will def do a separate post on this job because let me tell you- it is VERY interesting. Life living with The Boy is great. We havent had any huge fights when it comes to the living situation. I like being able to see him almost daily (even if our scheds are crazy and I only see him in bed). And I've made a new group of friends basically, thanks to me not being bossed around by others.

I think I'll do some individual posts on different issues so this isn't a 50 page post. Anyway, I have to go mediate one of the kids here- you would not believe the drama in high school (another post, I promise).

Thanks for catching up!